Flight of the Bloodmobile, Chapter 7

And here's Chapter 7.

Flight of the Bloodmobile, Chapter 6

Yeah... like I mentioned before, I've written around 12 chapters of this... but for a long time there were a couple chapters I just didn't have titles for, and I didn't want to upload them without titles.  There's still one I haven't titled yet, so I can only upload these until Chapter 10 for now... but still, that's twice as many as what was here before!

Lizardmonsters!

Yep... these are another set of critters from the random game I've been working on.  As the title of this post suggests, they're called "Lizardmonsters."  Note that they are not dragons, because actual dragons have fur (a fact which seems to be commonly forgotten these days... probably D&D's fault for making them all giant inexplicably-spiky reptiles and trying to turn every mammal-like feature--aside from the wings anyway--into something weird and random like spikes, fins, or catfish whiskers.)

The Green Lizardmonster is large and fairly powerful (probably the 2nd-strongest), but due to its horrific obesity it's also the slowest of the bunch.  It attacks by farting on you or whacking you with the spiked thagomizer on its tail.  Due to its sheer weight, its most dangerous move is farting high into the air and then landing on its opponent.

The Red Lizardmonster is physically the strongest, and mostly attacks by biting, though it can also breathe fire.  Due to its resemblance to Barney, it may also have mind-altering powers that allow it to hypnotize and control small children, though it's not known for sure.  As the size of its wings suggest, it definitely can't fly using them.

The Black Lizardmonster lives in swampy areas and is faster than most of the others, though not as powerful as the Red or Green Lizardmonsters.  It's the only type of lizardmonster that's good at swimming.  The Black Lizardmonster attacks by belching and vomiting acidic goop on its victims, and also by biting and constricting opponents in its long body.

The Blue Lizardmonster is the fastest of the bunch (possibly due to its skinniness and actually having decent-sized wings) and lives in deserts.  Probably the most bizarre member of the lizardmonster family, the Blue Lizardmonster has several insect-like features (a mad scientist was probably involved...) and attacks with its scorpion-like venomous stinger as well as by spewing blasts of electricity out of its mouth.  Wait... it spits lightning? Okay, yeah, a mad scientist was definitely involved.

And finally, the White Lizardmonster is the weakest of the group.  Despite its feathery wings and beak, White Lizardmonsters are not birds (not even a less-feathery kind of bird, like dinosaurs); they're reptiles like all other lizardmonsters... somehow... I guess because of magic, or something.  Speaking of magic, they can attack by somehow spewing a blast of ice shards and freezing winds from their mouths.  Even though they're reptiles... supposedly.  Actually, that probably wouldn't work with a bird either.  Yeah... these ones are weird.

Something really odd I found drifting in the void of the Internet

The other day I randomly decided to search for things related to my old, crappy game The Kirby Lands on Google... and I ended up finding this oddity.  It's a post on the Kirby's Rainbow Resort forum, which I used to post on a long time ago... before they switched over to the current forum (so none of the posts from my active period on there still exist, as far as I can tell.)  Basically, this seems to be some kind of forum roleplaying/story thing, which isn't that unusual by itself... the weird part comes in when you look at who three of the characters happen to be.

Here's a brief except from one of the parts that features them.

 ….The Universe. It is an endless, boundless sea of stars that spread for eternity. In this eternal star ocean lays the Milky Way, the only star system where life is known to exist. In the far reaches of this brilliant galaxy dwells the Popstar system. This solar system is home to peaceful races that coincide with eachother….But as time has taught, there can never be peace without conflict. It is an endless cycle of fighting and peace that nothing can avoid.

Far, Far on the outside of the Popstar system floats another land. Only a few people from the inner system have ever been here, the others have never heard of it. This planet is known as “ The Kirby Lands”. Four years ago a horrific battle ensued on this lonely planet. A being known as Enduo attacked as the inhabitants were running a great tournament, known as “ The Tournament of Kirbies.” Rayd, Lunar, Killer Kirby, and Kirb fought bravely against this foe and were finally able to defeat him with the Kerhbi Bomb….

Four years have passed since then…..

A crowd is heard roaring loudly as 3 combatants enter the ring….

“Why is that pink Kirby here? Pink ones are too weak to fight in this kind of tournament.” Kirber asked Killer as the combatants entered the ring.

“You’ll see… I can’t believe you don’t remember….” Killer replied.

“….If you say so…” Kirber replied doubtfully…

“He’s right.” Kirb said motioning to Kirber. “ While working on new cameras for my….er…I mean… anyway, look at this.”

Kirb held up an energy scouter

“ Their power levels are only 5 and 8, they’re gonna get clobbered!” Kirb said worriedly.

“ Hahahaha, how soon you two forget!” Killer said laughing…

Down at the arena, one of the kirbies motioned to the other…

“…I’ve got this Sosuke” The Dreamlander with the white scarf said, as he motioned toward the other.

Sosuke nodded as he leaped off of the arena floor. Sosuke is a orange-ish color, wearing a blue bandanna. He has long blonde hair that’s spiked up above his head. Sosuke has a large scar across his eye.

The other combatant waved his arm and his scarf billowed as it was thrusted out of the way by his arm.

“ Who does this guy think he is?” the other fighter said, clicking buttons on his scouter. “ He’s only at level 5…”

The combatant smirked after the other fighter said this.

“…My my, you sure are cocky.” The combatant said.

“ Say what? Im about to whipe that grin off your face.” The fighter said.

A gong sounds.

As soon as the gong sounded the fighter lifted his hand up and fired an energy blast at the other combatant.

A ricochette and a explosion are heard. It echoes throughout the stadium…The combatant had deflected the energy blast.

The smoke from the blast spread across most of the arena floor, blocking out the view from most of the audience.

“Whats going on?” Kirb asked.

A loud echoing thud is heard, followed by groans of pain….as the dust settled, the combatant stood over the fallen fighter, his hand outstretched and his foot forward, a strike position. He turned around and walked off of the arena floor.

“ And the first bout goes to…Rayd Kiever!! The first elimination round has been finished!” The announcer yells.

“…Wait a sec…” Kirb said turning towards Killer. “ Isn’t that?!”

Killer smiled…

Yep, that is indeed someone else using Killer K'hyurbhi, Kurb, and Kirber (then known as Killer Kirby, Kirb, and... well, Kirber) as characters in their story.  And also randomly making the Kirby Lands (which, in the old game, were supposed to be a continent trapped in the Num Warps between nherbis) be a planet somewhere on the far reaches of Popstar's solar system, in Nintendo's Kirby universe.


Interestingly, it actually seems to use the "Killer Kirby taking on Kirber as his apprentice" thing mentioned at the end of The Kirby Lands... which either means that the guy who wrote this actually played through the game, or that I had mentioned that in the first tournament story and it just got carried over to here.  Killer Kirby being referred to as just "Killer" is kind of odd, though, especially considering that there already was a character named Killer (who was a Numnum.)


As far as I can remember, I didn't even know about this at the time it was being written, and I don't think anyone ever bothered to tell me that they were using my characters, either. (I wouldn't have really been able to get involved even if I knew about it, though, since at the time I had no idea how to use IRC chats, which they were apparently using for the battles.)  Of course, the thing never seems to have been finished, but still... it's really weird to randomly bump into something like this.
And for a bit of backstory: the "Enduo" mentioned isn't exactly Enduo Ril (aka Eddie Ril, who appears in Fnrrf Ygm Schnish: Alleghany Hell School) as we know him.  I actually do vaguely remember the original Tournament of Kirbies (sic) story, at least well enough to remember that part of it involved Eddie, Bridget, and Geno (from Super Mario RPG) being turned into Kirby-like creatures and brainwashed to attack everyone during the tournament.  I think Orrannudum, the evil mad scientist K'hyurbhi that Killer K'hyurbhi sealed away a long time ago, was responsible for it... though I can't remember for sure off the top of my head.   I find it kind of odd that only one of the three attackers from the first story is mentioned in this one (I'm assuming because Enduo was the last of the three to be defeated?) and that Orrannudum himself isn't, so I guess it's possible that Orrannudum never really made an appearance in the first story, or people forgot about him since he probably wasn't really much of a fighter compared to the other three.  Of course, this was apparently made in 2004, when the original story couldn't have been more than 2 or 3 years old... so I dunno.

In case you actually want to see this wackiness for yourself, here's a link to it.

Random critters, ahoy!

Some random critter graphics from a game that I'm sort of working on randomly.  Probably won't be done enough to get a demo release anytime soon (if ever), at least not before FYS:AHS and The K'hyurbhi Lands have demos and Okédoké is finished... but I'll still upload some random stuff.  Like these.

Dust Bunny

Seems kind of small and harmless, doesn't it? I haven't decided if this is an actual bunny or an actual dust-blob yet, if it's either of them.  I'm leaning more toward "actually a bunny" at the moment.

Either way, probably a low-level critter.

Pirate Earthworm


Arrrr, mateys! This one has a cutlass... how exactly a worm (which has nothing even vaguely resembling hands) can use a sword is unknown.  There's also one with a pistol, which seems even more unlikely considering that you need not just hands but fingers to work a trigger.  Also, it's wearing an earring despite not having any ears. XD

Serial Killer Pig

This one's actually based on a Burger King commercial that I remember seeing a while back.  It was advertising that they had ribs now, or something like that... and the advertisement had a pig, walking on two legs and carrying around a big casserole dish full of the new ribs.  Which... are made of pig. He's a serial killer pig trying to dispose of the bodies!

Man-Eating Pants

The bane of all pantsless drunk guys trying to get ready early in the morning, the Man-Eating Pants lie around on floors waiting for someone to try and put them on.  Since they're not too bright, they sometimes also bite at people who just try to pick them up (to put them in the laundry, for example) and can't put themselves into drawers or anything.

Devil-Fetus

Yep, the standard "floating demonic fetus with tentacled placenta o' doom."  There's an enemy like this toward the end of Okédoké, too.

I'm kind of disturbed by the fact that this time, I actually somehow managed to make this little thing look sort of cute.  If you ignore the tentacled goop.

Bloody English Mole

Another repeat appearance--the Bloody English Moles first showed up in my Earthbound ROM hack, though they didn't look quite so stereotypically British back then.  Tophat and monocle, tea, they even have the accent.  I would've given them a crumpet, too, if I actually knew what crumpets looked like.

Crispy Black Thing Fairy

A creepy old fairy thing that flies around with a bag full of "crispy black things," which she puts in people's bellybuttons as they sleep.  Sort of like the much creepier older cousin of the tooth fairy.

"Crispy black things" are based on a true story, by the way.  Probably not the fairy part, though.

Sea Elephant

A large aquatic mammal that swims through the oceans with its... ears.  Yep, sea elephants swim with their ears.  I figure they're also a bit smaller than land elephants, just based on what this thing looks like, even though sea critters are usually bigger than their land-dwelling equivalents.

Fnrrf Ygm Schnish wiki weirdness

I wonder why it is that Matsu Cracke's page on the Fnrrf Ygm Schnish wiki gets so many hits compared to all of the other pages on there? Seriously... I just checked the numbers of hits for every page and he's at 152, which is just short of overtaking the Fnrrf Ygm Schnish timeline page (which has probably the most information out of the entire wiki, being a timeline of pretty much everything that's ever happened in the Fnrrf Ygm Schnish universe.)  That's kind of ridiculous.

And on top of that, Matsu is way ahead of any other character's page; the next-highest are Ma-Du Nebozu (with 130) and Eddie Ril (with 108.)  Other pages in that range are mostly pages of entire species (like the Yenrab, Blurbys, and K'hyurbhis... with the Numnums, oddly, lagging behind a bit), which get linked to a ton and are mentioned on a lot of other pages.

I wonder why Matsu, of all characters, is getting so much attention on the wiki?  His page hasn't been on there incredibly long (it's only from mid-2011, there's a bunch of pages on there nearly a year older) and isn't linked from all that many other pages (only 9, plus a redirect for if you just type in "Matsu"), at least when compared to the other most-popular pages (for comparison: Adam Nebozu has more than three times that number in actual links, plus two redirects for "Adam" and "Ma-Du Nebozu.")  So I have no idea what could be making so many people look at this one guy's page more than others.

Maybe it's Japanese people, or people searching for Japanese stuff... since apparently "matsu" means "pine tree" in Japanese (I didn't know this when I came up with the name, of course; he has nothing to do with trees.)  That's all I can think of, anyway.

Random-generator names.

Remember how I mentioned that I came up with some character names a while ago using a random generator? Well, I found the text file where I put the rest of those names, the ones I ended up not using.  Here they are!

Xelce
Zemon
Garga
Tantho
Gantido
Goril
Joril
Selal
Zesticho
Honcheu
Ulan
Aeresci
Iari
Lymamo
Thesona
Xeri
Briadi
Eraremaro
Jota
Onthel
Terophel
Leroni
Rethodi
Mamoisa
Zericha
Troronu
Galoneo
Jomarusia
Dusoe
Lyrone
Niasus
Saian
Ustem
Entus
Hinoda
Heunon
Molosia
Alidol
Larnon
Armustu
Exumon
Insar
Olon
Saor
Iseuss
Pobatah
Tazon
Ushar
Tizoz
Ahatas
Arutas
Daronth
Meralon
Vamaos
Agerar
Maragah
Tarando
Dogar
Gimon
Ongulas
Daralas
Ugui
Vangol
Medime
Ascetegue
Dadapa
Mobol
Matreus
Ephescan
Paphon
Velvola
Rynna
Heryn
Kalam
Hacahac